week 12

This week our main topics were divorce and stepfamilies.

I have NOT been looking forward to this week because this hits way too close to home for me right now. I was dreading what might come from my classmates, or what statistics might be given. I wasn't ready to accept that my family may be without hope.

However, that is not what this class was about. I thought it was so refreshing to hear a discussion about when it is OKAY to get a divorce.

I believe divorce happens for only two reasons, and that is selfishness and abuse. And honestly, selfishness is something people can overcome and rise up from. However, I never understood that abuse might be the same way. A lot of the time it means that a relationship needs to end..immediately. But there are two different kinds of abuse and situations.

It is just another reason why we can't judge a book by its cover, everyone has a different family situation and for us to try and assume that we know what is going on --especially in the case of divorce and step families then we are not only harming their progress, but also our own as well.

Week 11

Our main topic of discussion this week, was Parenting. Even though, i am very far from this step in my life, I know the importance of listening and paying close attention to the teachings we are given.

I think my favorite discussion so far this week, was when we talked about how there should only be a husband and a wife in the delivery room. I thought it was really interesting to see different perspectives and experiences of my classmates.

I am going to sound really immature -- but i think childbirth is gross. I hope that I change my mind by the time that I am ready to have children, but my whole life I have said that it will be a miracle if I even allow my husband in the delivery room. (which is kind of a joke..but kind of not) I actually thought it was really beneficial to know that when there are only two in the room then there will be a bond between the husband and wife that could not be there if there were mothers or mother in laws present too.

The next topic is spanking. I don't want to say that I will spank my children, but I am also not on the other really opposite end of saying that i definitely won't either. I think the key lies in knowing that when my parents spanked me, they also had unfailing love for me too. It was just the only way they knew how to express that i did something wrong. Sometimes talking about it, isn't as affective.

week 10

This week we've talked a lot about finances. It kind of stressed me out more than anything. Seeing how much money it costs to raise a family is incredible.

It made me think about my own family and how I was raised. We were a single income family. My sisters and I didn't participate too much in any sports, but my sister Marcie played the flute in the marching band, so there were some costs from that needed.

I feel like we traveled quite a bit. Every summer we would travel to different blind conventions whether they were in Texas, Washington DC, or Oklahoma. and because of my dads blindness a lot of extra expenses were needed for my family that weren't needed for others. We needed special assitive technology, and we used a lot more gas than most families since my mom had to take my dad to work and to meetings everyday.

Budgets scare me, if i'm being completely honest. And while I know i need to be a part of it when I get married, I hope that my husband has a sense of patience for it so that we can narrow down things from wants to needs.

This week has just reminded me how important it is for me to be financially stable before I get married and to start putting forth a budget now so that it isn't a complete shock when I have a family to help support.

week 9

This week the main topic of discussion that I remember is talking about our problems in communication.

We got into our small family groups and had to give each person our ultimate attention, while they conveyed to us their communication struggles. It was really difficult to me to not let my mind wander. There were a lot of things repeated and I was the second to last to present so it was kind of difficult for me to not think about what I was going to say.

That is my biggest communication problem. I unintentionally story top others and it bothers me so much!! I hate it when I get done telling a story and then someone else is there ready to come up with something ten times more exciting or interesting. But as much as I hate that I have to admit that I am guilty of it as well.

It is never because I want to make someone feel bad about what they have to say, but more because I feel like it relates and I want them to know that they aren't alone in whatever they are going through.

Something else we did this week was hold hands with a complete stranger, make eye contact, and tell them three genuine compliments. This wasn't the most painful thing ever for me, but I did find the eye contact to be difficult. I don't know why it feels so awkward to me. I think my partner had the biggest difficulty with holding hands. We were holding hands before we even knew each others name, but it proved a point of how important certain aspects of communication are for others.

week 8

This week we talked about family crisis.

I know that every family goes through crisis, so it was interesting to hear the different ways that families deal with them. I was raised in a house of writers, and I have a strong belief that when we write, our feelings finally connect with our brains. It's probably because we don't have much of a choice. How boring would it be to read "I don't know how i feel" over and over again? We have been blessed with such a large vocabulary from books and peers, and I think that's a good way to make use of it.

The thing that I took from this weeks classes were that we all need support systems, we all need an outlet that we can turn to when we feel pressure. Coping skills are an incredible thing and they are so necessary in everyone's lives so that when the stress hits us we know how to come away from it a stronger and more calm person.